Control Holiday Stress

As we head into the holiday season, I remindpeople who I interact with. It is possible to say
myself that this is supposed to be a season of"no" when I am invited to a holiday event that I
joy. But for many of us,it is a season of stress.don't really want to attend. I am in control of my
I was raised in a typical American pseudo-Christianschedule.
household that did all of the commercial ChristmasAs the holidays approach, I spend some time
things. The majority of my holiday seasons havemeditating and refecting upon what experience I
gone like this: spend lots of money, worry if Iwould like to have. This year, I want my daughter
bought everyone the "perfect" gift, eat a lot,to experience the wisdom of all of the sacred
drink too much, spend a lot of time in the kitchenholidays and the winter solstice. So, my husband
cooking and cleaning, experience euphoria onand I are going to have fun celebrating lots of
Christmas Eve and Christmas day, followed by adays.
big crash after the New Year. Then, I wouldI love getting a tree and decorating it and singing
tough it through the boring, blah winter months.carols - these give me joy. I love baking cookies
Winter was always a let-down after the holidays.with my mom. I enjoy shopping for meaningful
Does this sound familiar to anyone? In reality,gifts on the internet. I enjoy spending time with
why should December 25 or December 26, 2005friends. I will make one trip to the mall to see the
be any different than any other day? It is just adecorations. I will pause to reflect upon the
24-hour time period. Ideally, if we are connectedchange of seasons. I will cook healthful meals,
to our source, every day is one of celebrationmeditate, and exercise as I always do.
and joy.2) Joy and peace are inner jobs. Whenever
Some people love the glitz and glamour of thesomething happens - an event or thought - that
holiday season. Others despise thedisturbs my peace and equanimity, I have an
commercialization of the holidays. I used to roll myopportunity to explore what button has been
eyes and wax poetic on the corruption of sacredpushed. A guru has showed up to show me how
holidays. Geez, people get into debt, get stressedto maintain my natural state of peace and joy.
out, everything is for sale - "peace", "joy", "love" -Thank you! If I overextend myself and get too
I would rumble.tired and cranky, I will get a reminder to slow
However, since I have changed my view fromdown and rest. If I get angry at having to do
one of scarcity to one of abundance, I see thingssomething, this is a reminder that I missed an
a bit differently. Now, I marvel at the abundanceopportunity to say "no".
of gifts, decorations, food, etc. Wow! This is a3) Every day is a celebration. I can experience
really abundant world, I think. And, I can choosejoy without the hysterical holiday euphoria by
whatever I want from this holiday smorgasbord. Icounting my blessings every day and knowing
am free to leave whatever I want alone.that each day is a gift. As I celebrate these
Why do some people see what they like and"special" days with my family and friends, Ihave a
others focus on what they don't like? Well, it's all aunique opportunity to express my love in focused
matter of controlling your focus, thoughts, andways. Remember: Choose joy. Make each and
emotions.every day special. Make it a celebration.
What is the best way to control holiday stress?Here is an exercise that will help you to avoid
Focus on what you want out of the holidays andholiday stress. Spend some time reflecting on
ignore the rest. There are only a few things thatwhat you like and don't like about the holiday
we can control in life: Our thoughts and how weseason. If you were to design a perfect couple of
spend our time. Make sure that you are in controldays or weeks, what would it look and feel like?
of what you focus upon and how you spend yourWho would you spend time with? Where would
time.you go? What holiday(s) would you choose to
I have finally learned to stay grounded, centered,celebrate? Make this part of your daily intention
and peaceful during this time of the year. Andsetting and if you find that your current plans
when January 2nd arrives, I am no more or lessdon't groove with your desires, then make a
energized or burnt-out than I was on Decemberchange now. Book that cruise, cancel unwanted
2nd.travel. It is your life - do what makes YOU happy.
How do I do this? By remembering the following 3You are not responsible for anyone else's
things:happiness. If you are dreading a trip to the
1) I am in control of my experience - I canin-laws, then cancel it or cut it short. Practice Joy!
choose all of my activities,conversations, and